Being in law enforcement is, in some ways, a lot like being in any other industry or profession: stick with it long enough, and before too long, you’ll adopt an entirely different lexicon…
If you’ve ever done a ride-along with a police officer or just tuned in to the local scanner traffic, you’ll have doubtlessly heard that, while they are speaking English, it often sounds like a different language. That’s because cops use a lot more slang than most.
Keep reading, and I’ll give you the inside scoop on some police slang terms that are actually pretty funny. Though you’ll want to watch this short stand-up first (ha-ha):
Perp
Refers to the perpetrator of a crime, aka the bad guy or wrongdoer.
Vic
Typically refers to the victim of a crime. Sometimes used as shorthand to refer to the Ford Crown Victoria, a well-known and iconic police cruiser.
Cuff-and-Stuff
Colloquialism that refers to cuffing a suspect and placing them in the backseat of a cruiser or other police vehicle. Often, but not always, refers to an actual arrest.
Hook-and-Book
May be used interchangeably with cuff-and-stuff above, but more commonly refers to a legitimate arrest with subsequent criminal charges.
Smokepole
Old-school term that refers to a shotgun, specifically the patrol shotgun that was a fixture in every police cruiser in decades past. May be used to refer to any long gun, but this is less common.
Leg Bail
To escape or evade arrest on foot. A person’s legs are providing their bail in this case!
Skate
To get out of trouble, usually by some technical or procedural error or occasionally by cleverness. For instance, a criminal may skate on charges if they are connected to a powerful or influential family or if a district attorney lacks the will to prosecute.
Sometimes used by cops to refer to other police officers who always manage to duck or evade extra shifts or mandatory duty.
Hickory Shampoo
Old timer slang for a severe beating doled out by police, typically issued via equally old-fashioned baton or nightstick. So named because the batons of yesteryear were typically made from hard, dense hickory wood. Not something cops should do these days…
Dogworthy
Term that refers to the viability and likelihood of further investigation with a trained canine. Example: The contacting officer was assessing the dogworthiness of the traffic stop.
The Man
Highly flexible term that refers to police and law enforcement as an institution broadly. Always capitalized. You don’t want to get in trouble with The Man, so you should obey the law.
5-O (Five-Oh)
Common term that refers to police individually or as an organization. Derived from the old show Hawaii Five-O.
Fuzz
Slang term that refers to police generally. If you see one cop or several responding to a call or a crime in progress, you could say that the fuzz has arrived.
TNT
Ticket-an’-Tow. Used as an operational descriptor for a vehicle that’s in violation, and police personnel may use it internally when referring to parking enforcement duty. E.g., I’m on TNT duty.
Amateur Night
Police slang for New Year’s Eve, a date that invariably results in a tremendous number of drunk driving offenses, arrests, and general mayhem. Dreaded by many police officers.
Gumshoe
A detective, or sometimes used derogatorily by police to refer to private investigators. So named from the tendency of such personnel in eras past to wear soft rubber-soled shoes that were quieter and better for on-foot surveillance and stakeout duty.
Donnybrook
A brawl or other huge fight, typically one involving multiple participants. May refer to a bar brawl or similar scuffle.
Heat
A term that refers to police generally, e.g., the heat, and also police attention or presence. A serious or ongoing crime that involves more and more police officers, multiple agencies, or special assets like canine teams, aircraft, and the like is said to be getting a lot of heat.
Paw Patrol
Refers to a canine officer and his dog as a team and the duty associated with the same. Regular patrol officers who call in the paw patrol have need of a canine on scene.
Local Yokel
A term often leveled at overly enthusiastic city or sometimes county police officers belonging to small or underfunded departments. Typically used by members of a larger agency and especially State Police.
Glowie
When used by police, refers to an undercover or low-profile officer who, despite their best efforts, is still extremely obvious in comportment or appearance. They glow in the dark!
Used more generally by the public, this term often refers to undercover federal agents infiltrating civilian gatherings or groups, and used for the same purpose.
Ghetto Bird
Police helicopter. Sometimes referred to as just the bird. So named because these aircraft constantly orbit high-crime areas and larger metropolitan areas, i.e., it is a bird that lives in or is attracted to the ghetto!
Hot Roller
A stolen vehicle, used especially when the vehicle is seen in operation with a driver at the wheel. In police parlance, anything that is described as hot is stolen, and an automobile is sometimes called a roller, hence hot roller!
Cop Shop
A tongue-in-cheek reference to a donut shop or any other restaurant or eatery where cops tend to congregate. May be mildly derogatory in some contexts. This term can also be used to refer to a police headquarters or patrol station. It varies by locale.
Pig
A police officer. Often used derogatorily by criminal elements or those who are anti-law enforcement generally. Some cops use this term playfully or as a tongue-in-cheek reference to themselves or coworkers.
Lice
Another categorical term for police or police presence. Derived from clipping off the first two letters in the word police. Can be used as a compound descriptor to describe police of different agencies or levels, e.g., county lice, city lice, etc.
Old Bill
Obscure, old term originating in England that refers to city police generally or individual patrol officers particularly. “There’s Old Bill pushing a post.”
Paddy Wagon
A van, truck, or other large vehicle used for transporting multiple prisoners at once. The name was originally coined in England and used to describe the wagons that would transport large groups of Irish who were placed under arrest. Paddy is a mildly offensive euphemism for an Irish person.
Town Clown
Another term that describes a problematic, overly enthusiastic, or incompetent local police officer, typically one belonging to a small town or village police department. Synonymous with “that guy” as used in military and other parlance.
Pikachu
Any cop who has a bright yellow hazard or safety vest on, typically worn by those who are on intersection duty directing traffic when a traffic light fails or during any similar occurrence. Named for the Pokémon of the same name due to its bright yellow fur.
JDLR
Acronym for just doesn’t look right, or just don’t look right. Refers to a police officer’s hunch or instincts that something is amiss, even if it isn’t immediately apparent.
Road Pirates
Derogatory term used by civilians to describe police and police departments that are enthusiastic about giving tickets, issuing citations, conducting civil asset forfeiture, and similar revenue-generating activities.
Obviously named for classical pirates’ MO of using force and intimidation to extort money and valuables from their victims.
Alphabet Soup Agency
Catch-all term used by police at any level referring to federal agencies. Federal agencies like the FBI, CIA, EPA, NSA, ATF, and so forth have acronyms that might be seen in any given spoonful of alphabet soup!
Tom Marlowe practically grew up with a gun in his hand, and has held all kinds of jobs in the gun industry: range safety, sales, instruction and consulting, Tom has the experience to help civilian shooters figure out what will work best for them.